30 Nov Christmas Shopping & Grief

Christmas Shopping & Grief

Grief can make Christmas Shopping difficult.  My first husband, Donald, died right before Thanksgiving in 1999.  None of my Christmas shopping was done and I was in such a state of shock and numbness that I just couldn’t make myself do it. Fortunately, my friend Sue immediately acted when she learned that I had not even started my shopping—and, in fact, was avoiding doing it.

She called me one morning and told me she would be over the next day to take me Christmas shopping because my children needed presents under the tree from me… I said no.  She explained to me that no was not an option and she told me her estimated time of arrival.  When she arrived the next morning, she made sure I had good walking boots on my feet and my cash and my charge cards in my pocketbook.  Off we went.  I was tired, overwhelmed, didn’t want to go… but by the time we were done I was very grateful.  She even took me out to lunch. I learned again on that day what a special friend she is.  She let me speak my words of grief and whine, be angry… she listened as we shopped. There was no judgment or later telling other friends that grief had temporarily caused me to lose my mind.  I have always been able to trust her with my pain.

If you can’t make yourself shop, it’s time to call your special, trusted, friend and ask him or her to pick you up, drive, and, if necessary, drag you through stores…

Be the trusted friend. If you have a friend who is grieving, consider calling him or her and offer to take them shopping.

Healing Forward Together!

Linda